Mushy Multiculturalism

Published in The Word March/April 2006 Issue 18

Peter Costello, marching along behind his great and glorious leader, John Howard, condemns “mushy multiculturalism”. It is great that our leaders are capable of condemning something as indefinable as “mushy multiculturalism”. Costello presumably to the tune of a Hillsong hymn “Onward Christian Soldiers” decided it was time to poke some of our Muslim fellow citizens in the eye. Presumably they were perceived by the Donna Vales of the Coalition of attempting too much begatting.

Treasurer Pete assured all and sundry that Australian values, for example the decency demonstrated by true blue Aussies at the Cronulla riot, needed to be adhered to by recent immigrants particularly those who might be tempted to aspire to live under a system of Sharia Law. Only Treasurer Pete, whose personal god is monetarism, or John Howard, whose private deity is militarism, could presume to know to what people, they’ve never met, aspire.

By now the astute reader will have made the connection between mushy multiculturalism and Pete and John’s gods. The PM and Treasurer’s combined god is militaristic monetarism and they are at war with mushy multiculturalism. The multi M words are henceforth banned unless uttered by a Liberal politician wrapped in an Australian flag.

Of course this analysis might be wide of the Mark Vale and the explanation for such stupid behaviour could simply be that Pete and John are racist.