In praise of the Coalition

Dutton’s done and dusted
it’s just our hearts he’s busted.
Scomo’s never to be trusted
and Porter’s maladjusted –
a sociopath mistrusted.

Melissa Price is just not nice
a stupid racist xenophobe
and there’s Tony Abbott
a hopeless slimy homophobe.

Then there’s Darren Chester
just a failed court jester.
Well there’s David Coleman
nearly half a whole man
a wantabeen, a mighthavebeen
a slow witted couldhavebeen
all he’s lacking is a spleen.

Clean coal Frydenberg
an environmentalist?
“Are you pissed?”
Julia Banks is taking a punt
on rhyming slang Greg
not being in the hunt.

Christopher gets his mojo
selling weapons to Saudis
to slaughter Yemeni children.
Keenan thinks he’s flash
but he’s really done his dash.
Now Dan Tehan can’t aspire
to be more than a sleazy liar.

Paul Fletcher can be described as
Minister for Insecurity,
Minister for Insincerity,
Minister for Unbelievability.

Their dubious careers
one long Faustian stain
they had to ditch decency,
sold out their humanity
lost their grip on reality
but are, enjoying their lobotomy.

As for the rest of the incompetents
on Morrison’s gravy train
the kind would say nothing.
It is better to refrain.

But for the moment
we’ll let them strut around
they wouldn’t know
if the sails were set
or, if they had run aground.

Tony’s lost confessor
an antigay professor
no longer an oppressor
can’t save this lot’s souls
because they are –
just a bunch of
useless arseholes.