The writers dilemma

Written circa 2004 unpublished

I have tried to articulate a critique of what I observe happening around me. But that is not enough. I have acted when I could to the extent that it would not jeopardise my capacity to continue to criticise what I witness. But I know that this is not enough. I despair when others do not want to share my view of the world and join me in opposition. I am trapped by my failure to inspire with my words yet driven to keep writing. I am undermined by my desire to maintain my relative privilege. I am frustrated by my failure to change the things I rail against. I am thrilled when someone listens, understands and is moved by what I write. The choice which preoccupies me is to keep writing, speaking and acting however impotently or to end it all in one desperate act. That way you only fail once.